Chaos Of Thought And Passion, All Confus'd

May 3, 1994

What i like about my martial arts school is that the place makes sense. Dedicated. Simple. Monomaniacal. You're there for one purpose and one purpose only, and that's to learn the martial arts. Nothing else. Not like my life, which is utterly chaotic, or like my family, which is a band of lunatics.

Everybody's family is crazy, I suppose, but mine is also big. Big and loony. A difference in degree can become a difference in nature. The whole world is nuts, and you can't count on anything from one sunrise to the next. You try and get things done and something else gets in the way that demands immediate attention, and while you're stomping out that brushfire another one starts someplace else and you rush over to it and start stomping before the first one was quite out, which means that sooner or later you're going to be back to the first one again, and you never actually get anything done.

The school is a breath of mountain air, a draught of cool water. If I could, I would spend all my time in this island of peace dedicated to the arts of war, where everything is orderly because nothing else is allowed in. I believe I can tell you why Hitler was elected chancellor.

3/17/99

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