All About Eve

Eve not only did not have a navel, she did not have a wedding. She just woke up one morning in the arms of Adam, whom she had never seen (and who, for that matter had never seen her---talk about an arranged marriage), and without so much as a by-your-leave, and in the complete absence of any other suitable humans (or any other humans at al), perforce spent the rest of her life bearing children in sorrow, while Adam himself, for the next 930 years, earned their bread by the sweat of his face. On the positive side, he alone of all men did not have a mother-in-law. 

Thus, is was not surprising that, when Eve's first daughter grew old enough to be married, Eve horned in and took over, on the grounds that not only was her wedding day not special and wonderful, it didn't even happen, and she was going to make double-extra-super sure that her daughter's wedding day was just perfect in every way, the way hers hadn't been. 

This set the precedent. This is why no woman has a perfect wedding, and why the mother-of-the-bride takes charge (under the guise of "just helping out, I don't want to be in the way") and ruins it, and thereby compels her own daughter to play "pass the trash." 

Oh yeah. Eve, the world's first mother, was also the world's first mother-in-law. She set the precedent for that, too. Talk about original sin! Sheesh!

(September 15, 2008) 

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All About Eve

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